Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Day 305; A Little Bit of Gratitude...

Eternally Grateful

…Goes A Long Way

In the wake of the storm that has devastated the Northeast and the storm of life, I am constantly reminded of the power of gratitude. It goes a very long way.
Being thankful for what I have and who you am, the friends and family who gather around me is constantly on my mind.
As I become more well, I see all of the things that I have taken for granted. Ask anyone who has lost the use of their predominant hand or arm and they will tell you what it’s like to be without.
Today, I was reminded of my right hand being broken and how I learned to use the left. This morning while holding my tooth brush with my right hand, I recalled what it was like to not be able to.
Just as with most things in life, when my right hand was back to normal, I completely forgot the left.
The injury to my head and brain has not been so easy nor has it easily healed, but here I am writing and working each morning and extremely grateful that I can.
The injury has changed my way of looking at life and the way I live it. I live less in my head and more from the heart. I am at times confused and frustrated but here I am; still whole and complete, for even without I am beautiful and wonderfully made.
More importantly; I am healed. My gratitude allows it to be so.
This morning, I’d like for you to spend a moment remembering what works. Be grateful for a body that works even if it doesn’t look like the one you desire.
Be grateful for the availability of electricity and fuel even if the price is high; you have it.
Be grateful for friends and family who sometimes annoy you because you annoy them and they are still with you.
Be grateful for the job you say you don’t like because it’s paying for that gas that’s too high.
And be grateful for a mind that works even when you use it to complain, and nitpick the details of a life that goes unappreciated.
I hope you get my drift because I’m grateful that you are reading this.

We are connected. Gratitude goes a very long way and always comes back to you.
Be you, be well, be grateful.
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Day 304:Fighting the WInd

Fighting the Wind

There is an ancient proverb which reveals this: “One who fights without a purpose is fighting the wind.”

I once used this proverb as a title for a movie script. The movie was never made because the folks I wrote it for had a meeting in the Trade Center Tower that fateful September 11th day.
 I did not attend. I didn’t feel like going because I had been to New York two weeks in a row when my dear friend Gillian got sick and then passed away.
Life can sometimes feel like the wind; blowing us hither and yon. Sometimes, we want to take up a sword to fight it, but then we see there is no reason or purpose; that we are fighting the wind.
Sometimes the wind blows in our favor; or so it seems, because at those times we fail to remember the destruction the wind did to us the last go-around.
We cannot fight the wind. All we can hope to do is to be wise, prepared, and proactive.
Life is like the wind; it blows in our favor and can tear our lives asunder. We cannot fight it, but we can be wise, proactive and prepared.
You are not your house; you are spirit dwelling in a body. You can be wise. Care for and keep your body well, because like it or not, the wind is blowing.

Be you, be well, be wise.
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Monday, October 29, 2012

Day 303; We Need You To Shine Your Light

Right now, as I am writing this, a hurricane is barreling up the east coast of the United States and you may be wondering, “What can I do to stop a storm?”
The answer to that question and any question pertaining to the safety and concern for another is to shine your light.
During the period of slavery in the U.S and abroad, the Society of Friends or Quakers as they were known believed then as they do now that everyone has a light. They believed that we all need the light of one another to illuminate our own path. This belief made them the first and most powerful religious group to stand against slavery and for the freedom of all.
Their work towards the abolition of slavery ranged from shining their light to their physical involvement in the Underground Railroad.
Today, I’d like you to shine your light. Speak kindness to others and think clear, concise thoughts of encouragement.
Call, write, email or send a text to those who you know are in the path of the storm. Let them know that you are thinking of them and sending love and light. Then go a step further and do as the abolitionists did and offer a place to stay if necessary.
Be the illumination we need today and in the future. Shine your light.
Whether you believe in global warming or not, is not my concern. (Though there is so much I’d like to write, I think I will just keep my candle going.) Do your part for the earth and the environment.
I live in a small town that did not have a recycling program. Every week, my family and a few others would gather our recyclables and take them to the dump. We did this with joy; feeling a sense of doing our part.
We felt that if we continued, things would eventually change. At times it felt like we were alone, but then on Saturday mornings, we’d see another family who felt and did the same. We’d give each other a thumbs-up and kept on keeping on.
Recently, our township finally voted on a city-wide recycling program. I don’t think we caused it, but I know we helped it along.
The right thing happens when people thinking right thoughts do their part and shine their light.
This morning I’ve written about slavery, recycling and a hurricane; what I’m really trying to convey is the idea that you must shine your light.
The darker the situation, the greater the need for your light; shine it brightly today and for the rest of the week.
·         Avoid gossip and thoughts of jealousy and strife.

·         Stay clear of conflict and animosity.

·         Think and breathe light on negativity.

·         Share thoughts and words of encouragement.

·         See beauty all around you.

·         Give love.
As we individually do these things, we make the whole world much brighter.
Be you, be well, be love.
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Day 302; God's Answer

God’s Answer

Yesterday my sister Christine shared one of the most provocative lessons I’ve ever heard. I will go to my grave with what she shared.
If I sound a little over the top, I assure you it won’t feel that way to you. If what she shared does not move you to do and be better than maybe her lesson was not that deep after all and maybe, just maybe, I have been writing every day for nothing.
My sister said she was talking to God and she asked a simple question; “What can I do for you God.” She said that the answer came swift and surely: “You can take care of yourself.”
Now, I don’t know about you, but for me, this is rather profound.
We all need to do for ourselves and we need to take better care of our own existence. Only then can we look to one another and see the God in us.
Personal growth is one the essential needs; yet, we buy into the marketing idea that we have to look better and can do so without being better.
There is a great deal of emphasis on the packaging of things and very little concern about the thing inside the package.
My sister Christine’s conversation with God was about her taking care of her. She is truly my sister and I have inherited many of her qualities. We often do for others and fail to do for ourselves.
I’m not making an argument for being selfish; I’m talking about understanding that in order to help others get well, you must be well.
Yesterday, I allowed her conversation with God to guide my day. I found that I was less bothered by what I would have called “bad drivers” and I was less concerned about the missteps of anyone else. I had to take care of myself.
What if we all began to take better care of our own self? I don’t mean the body, I mean the self; the person that you are and are becoming. We’d be much less judgmental, and a lot slower to correct others. We’d be more mindful of the things we need to do and complete and less likely to expect someone else to be responsible for our happiness.
My sister’s answer from God is our answer for life.
Take responsibility, care, compassion, concern, regard, have love, and be wonderful to YOU.
Be you, be well, be your own care-giver.
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Day 301; What You Can Do About the Frankenstorm

Us Against The Storm

For the first time in my life, I got a call telling me that an event would be canceled because of an impending storm; this one must be big.
I worked a few days after the attack on the Trade Center Towers and worked in Louisiana shortly after the hurricane Katrina wreaked havoc there. I’ve been called in to places even when there is a blizzard and still the events and workshops were never cancelled; in fact the attendance always went up because when a storm comes, people are more inclined to see the need for personal growth and community involvement.
When I got an emergency call yesterday telling me that the huge event I was attending in Baltimore would be canceled, I knew it was time to get my heart in motion.
I believe in the power of prayer and I have faith in the power of collective consciousness. I know that together we are much more powerful than anyone or thing is alone.
I am asking and imploring you to stand together this weekend for the safety, love and strength of those in harm’s way.
The storm may have been the event that set this thought in motion, but it is not where we will stop.
I want you to read this and pass it on. I want you to ask your friends, neighbors and loved ones to lift up their hearts in love.
 Instead of coming against something, we are going to stand together for the safety and wellness of anyone in harm’s way; that can mean the storm, an act of terrorism and violence, abuse or even shame.
Let’s stand together in love. If you pray, then pray. If you meditate, do that. If you feel the need to fast and be mindful; then do it.
I am asking that you do whatever your heart leads you to do before the destruction hits.
At the top of every hour, let’s collectively stop and take a moment to reflect on love, kindness, healing and happiness.
Together, let’s stand for something good and in doing so we will defeat that which is not.
I believe and I’m asking you to believe and work with me.
Be you, be well, be the love.
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Friday, October 26, 2012


Be Creative

Okay boys and girls, get out your glue guns and glitter because one of your most basic needs is the need to be creative.
When we were children, our parents and teachers understood this need and so they gave us paint and sidewalk chalk, crayons and silly putty.
“Go make something,” you were told and we all happily did so.
But something has happened since I was a kid. Toys are all computerized and the only thing kids get to make is noise so we give them headsets so even that is unheard.
I used to make all of my jewelry. I’d sit up at night when the house was quiet and make some wonderful piece that I’d give to a friend. My home was frequently visited by artists who would share their gifts with my children who are now all wonderfully creative.
A few days ago, in the midst of a stressful day, I decided that I needed to make something with my own hands again so I made the wonderful head piece you see in the picture above.
I’m no artist, but I’m proud of that fact that I made it myself.
There is a reason why we need to create; it makes us human and connects us with the Creator and all of creation.
I could write more, but I’d like you to go and make something. You can work with a young person or a group of friends. You can even do it alone, but make something.
You will feel amazing when you do.
Be you, be well, be creative,
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Day 299: Are You THAT Friend?

Are You THAT Friend?

Personal growth is often ignored because it requires that we take a long, hard look at ourselves. (And if your mind went to the gutter, you can start there.)
We must constantly ask ourselves; “Is it me?” Ask yourself if you are the one who is argumentative and jealous? Are you the weight that’s holding the wagon down?
 Looking at yourself is not easy to do. It’s so much easier to see the faults of others; easier still to scapegoat our issues onto someone else.
We all know and have those friends who only call when they need or want something. I have a friend whom I’ve known since childhood and when I see her name on my phone’s caller ID (those inventors took suspicion and jealousy and put it right into our hands) and at first I am excited to hear from an old friend and then I remember that she must want something.
A few days ago, that friend called and I was really tired so I answered the phone and just said “What do you need?” She did not disappoint and started right in with her request.
I also have friends and family members who only call when they have bad news. I call one relative Schleprock after the character in the Flinstones who always declared “We’ll never make it.”
When he calls I know that someone has died or something terrible has happened. The truly odd things is this; I don’t even know the people he’s talking about, but Schleprock will insist that I do and will keep going with a list of descriptors until I convincingly say that I remember the poor soul he’s calling about.
We also have the complainers who only call to complain about ANYTHING. These are the folks I call the Whiners. They may be calling with a story about being cut off in traffic, someone staring at them the wrong way, or how someone has done them wrong again.
As I have grown and have had the opportunity to reboot my thinking, I see that I spend a lot less time on the telephone.
Bad news is really hard on the ringing in my head but it has an even worse effect on the beating of my heart.
I’ve been looking over my conversations with the Begging Bennys, the Schleprocks and the Whiners and I ask myself, “Is it me?”
A friend in need really is a friend in deed, because when you see the faults of others it serves as a reflection for your own soul.
If you don’t want to be THAT friend who only calls with a need, a sad story or negativity do this simple thing, call and inquire about the needs of someone else.

Be you, be well, be a better friend.
Bertice Berry, PhD.


Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Day 298: Are You Afriad to Be Happy?

And I'm not afraid of Ladybugs either

Afraid to Be Happy

Okay, I’m just going to get all up in your business and ask you if you are you afraid to be happy? Don’t answer too quickly, because you might not know the answer yet.
I didn’t until I was in my 30s (I love saying that, I feel like I finally have the mileage I need to be a classic; the kind that makes everyone stop and look as it drives by.)
Anyway, I was going through life afraid to express too much joy. I’d find myself in one of those moments where everything was going right and then I’d think, “Uh oh, something bad is going to happen, because everything is going too well.
I searched my soul for the source of that fear and recalled the day my grandmother died.
Caroline Freeman was a force to be reckoned with. At that time, no one knew her real age. The old court house in the town where she was from had burned down and so when she went for new documents, she lied about her age. Everyone thought that she was 70 but, in fact she was 90.
She had flawless skin and long straight hair and as it was said back then, she could have passed for a white woman, but didn’t. My grandmother was blind, but she was a colorist. She had three girls and according to her, my mother’s children were  “them black kids.”
Caroline fawned over my cousins but treated my siblings and me like we were no good. We still laugh about this woman who could not see, but did not like the darkness of our skin.
Like everyone you don’t care for, Caroline had great strengths as well. The neighbors respected her and deferred to her wisdom and influence. She always stood up for women who were abused and once even shot a man who had beaten his wife. (Yes, and she was blind.)
On the day my grandmother died, my family and I had been having the best day of our lives. We were at a park that had a lake for swimming; okay it was a pond, and enjoying that amazing day.
I told myself that this was the day that all days would be measured by. But then when we got back home, we learned that my grandmother had had a stroke and died.
It was the first time in my life that I had ever seen my mother cry. I was 12 and from that day on, life for my family was not the same. It was as if my grandmother had been our invisible glue.
When I first recalled this day and saw it as the source of my fear of happiness, I knew that I needed to do something, or be haunted forever.
Back then, I decided to just throw the fear away, but that was when I was in my 30’s now that I’m in my 50s I can face those fears and my grandmother.
I now look to that day and her life with love and forgiveness. I can feel her hand touching my head and I can see the look of disgust on her face. “This is one of Bea’s nappy headed black kids,” she would say.
I don’t know her whole story. I don’t know what she had to endure that made her mad at me. But I know that this is not my baggage to carry.
I know that I love this woman fiercely because I need to. I forgive and let go of the pain she inflicted on my mother and then the pain that was inflicted on me by both of them.
Only when we love, and forgive can we truly be free to be happy.

Go back and look at the source of your fear; forgive it and fly free.
Be you, be forgiven, be happy.
Bertice Berry, PhD.



Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Day 297; Beautiful As We Are

Beautiful As WE Are

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to speak to over 1,000 women---correction sisters at NEW, the Network of Executive Leadership Summit. This is a collective of sisters and some brothers who work in in Consumer Package Goods and The Retail Industry and are committed to the recruitment, advancement and retention of women.
The room was full of beautiful people, one just as beautiful as the next, but as the night went on I noticed something that will take me through the rest of my life. As the room of beautiful people became more and more connected, these beautiful people became even more radiant.
At first I thought it was just me, but someone else mentioned it and I knew that I was no longer seeing with my eyes, I was seeing with my heart.
During the reception, a woman told me that she would make sure that her friend started reading my blog, “She’s not feeling beautiful anymore,” the woman had said.
When she did, I knew that I’d have my topic for today. As I stood there talking to folks I realized what I had only previously pondered; “Beauty is as it believes.”
In a room of over 1,000 people who were connected in purpose and love, the beauty meter went up. The more connected we were, the more beautiful we became.
What if we truly are a reflection of one another and of our own heart?
What if people became more beautiful because of the shift in my own heart?
What if I need the love of others to feel more beautiful and what if that love enables me to see others as more beautiful as well?

I’ve always felt that I needed to see myself as beautiful before anyone else could, but last night, I came to see that I needed to see others as beautiful before I could feel that reflection.

We need we.
Be you, be connected, be beautiful.
Bertice Berry, PhD.


Monday, October 22, 2012

Day 296: Winning Is Nothing

Winning Is Nothing

I’ve been giving a lot of thought to the idea of winning and before you decide to never read this post again, I’d like you to do the same.
In this game we call life, we have been taught to win at any cost, but we do not always consider the price.
Winning is all about the ego and has nothing to do with your spirit; your energy; your essence.
When you spend the wealth of your existence striving to be better than everyone who is trying to be better than you, you find that you end up in a never ending game of trading spaces, with someone beating you out for a while and then you beating them.
“Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose,” we are told and we come to believe that the moment of glory is good enough, but you already know that it never is.
We want to be the richest, the prettiest, the thinnest, the most talented the most desirable, the best cook, the best parent, the best of the best. However, we’ve forgotten to be the best me.
Ask the winners about the glory after the game is over.
What if instead of winning, we focused on Being? What if we focused on making the world a better place by starting with our own self?
What if we knew that we were not in competition with one another and didn’t want to be better than our neighbors and friends?
What if we were seeking to be more loving, more kind, more caring, more down right adorable?
That’s a competition we should all sign up for, and when you do, know this; you are your only competition.

Be you, be well, be the prize.
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Day 295: Your Desires are Somone Else's Needs

Desires and Needs
Okay boys and girls, I’m going deep today, real deep.
What if your desires were somehow related to the needs of others? What if what you wanted was met when you met the needs of another?
Say you want money so that you can be as comfortable as possible? You might seek a way to make someone feel comfortable.
Some people may want to lose weight, so they can feel more attractive. You may need to seek an opportunity to help someone who feels disconnected and detached.
If you desire true love, so that your heart does not feel lonely and you feel more complete; you may want to help someone who is feels totally alone and without a friend.
A few days ago I was in the mall while waiting for my daughter. I don’t go there often so I decided to look around. While there, I found a coat I liked a lot. In it I felt more beautiful and confident, and it was on clearance sale. I bought the coat and then decided that I would get a cup of green tea. I got in line at the coffee shop but was suddenly overcome with the feeling that the last thing I needed was another coat. Just as I was about to be served, I felt the need to take the coat back. I got out of line returned the coat and felt somehow relieved.
It was time to pick up my daughter so I decided that I would get my green tea when I got closer to home. I went to the coffee shop in the grocery store and saw an employee who typically works in the morning.
I knew that the woman had just graduated from college and had studied to be a nurse. I’d overheard her a few weeks prior saying that she was saving up the money to take the test to be certified.
As I stood in this line, I heard her tell one of the regulars that she would have to wait a little longer before she took the test; her daughter needed something that took away from the test fund. Suddenly, I knew why I felt the strong urge to return the coat. I got my tea and slipped the coat money into her apron pocket and told her to take her test.
She protested but I told her that her taking the test would make me feel more beautiful and confident because when my sister does well, so do I.
She looked at me with tears in her eyes and I knew that I had some there too.
That evening a friend came in from out of town. I greeted him at the door and he looked at me and asked “What have you done, you look more beautiful and confident.” He said.
We are all connected by needs and desires; today allow your desires to be realized by meeting the needs of another.

Be you, be well, be desired and needed.
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Day 294: WIth Friends, Never Without

Never Without With Friends

Yesterday, I heard from my longtime friend, Pat who has moved to Ireland from the U.S. She told me that she was back in the States to tie up some loose ends and that for three weeks she’d be staying with friends and family.
An hour later, my sister Chris told me that when she mentioned that she was going to Delaware for a short holiday, friends and family were fighting over who she would stay with, because everyone wanted her at their house.
I was reminded of something another friend told me years ago, “When you have good friends, you can never be homeless.”
I know this to be true; still, we spend free time building up and maintaining our physical home, but often forget to build our relationships.
One of the best ways to assure happiness in this life is to build and develop good relationships. Research shows that people who have strong bonds with their friends and community tend to live longer, healthier lives.
I have strong ties with friends that I have had since kindergarten and equally strong bonds with some that I met two months ago.
When I lived in California, most of the folks I knew would drive home from work, into their garages and then from there, walk directly into their homes, never waving or speaking to anyone.
My sister/manager Jeanine and I started a prayer group which was really an eating club, and before long, my entire neighborhood was showing up.
Each Saturday, we’d get together to share the trials and joys of our lives and eat. We’d find ways to help the situation and then my mom said the same short prayer she had been saying for years:
“Devine Love, always has and always will supply our every need. So let nothing hinder, nor delay the Divine plane that the Creator has for your life today, we are moving on and on and on.”
After she said her prayer, everyone would talk and then eat some more and then hours later we’d part and say goodnight.
I live my life in the hopes that when I am gone, my friends will remember me by taking care of each other.
Care for your friends as if they are silver and gold, because they are.
Be you, be well, be a good friend.
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Friday, October 19, 2012

Day 293; Resisting Change

Sleeping on the edge

Resisting Change
The only constant is change; so why do we try to resist it? Resisting change is like asking the sun to never rise; you can try but it isn’t going to happen.
Last night I faced one of the biggest changes in my life. Wait for it, wait for it. ---I moved to the center of my bed.
Now, I have been sleeping in the same spot of every bed that I have slept in my entire life. I sleep on the left side of the bed and I sleep on the very edge of it. Yes, far left.
I don’t know why, but I always have. My loved ones (yes, I mean my kids,) have told me that I look as if I’m about to fall off the edge but I never do.
Last night, I decided that it was time to change; I moved to the center.
At first I wondered why I had not done it sooner. I felt like I was floating on a big wonderful cloud. I made imaginary snow angles and enjoyed the comfort of an entire bed. But then I noticed that I couldn’t sleep, I felt I needed to be on the edge. (Hmmm?)
All night I wrestled with myself trying to change one of my oldest and dearest habits.
Change is the only constant, but still it’s difficult. Our brain is only 2% of our body’s mass and yet it uses 26% of the energy. A new thought requires even more which is why change feels so difficult and so tiring.
All night long I laughed at myself as I fought hard to get to the center of that bed. (Yes, this would be a good place for a political joke, but I’m resisting that too.)
By the time I was comfortable in the center, it was time for me to wake up.
I got out of bed and turned to make it up and saw that it was a much bigger job than it would have been if I had been in my “spot.” Then I remembered why I slept on the edge.
When I was a kid and still in my mom’s house, I had to make up my bed as soon as I got out of it. I still do this today, but I do it as a prayer of gratitude for having a wonderful bed to sleep in.
As a child I noticed how much easier it was to make the bed if I didn’t lie all over it, so I started sleeping on the edge and it became a habit.
This morning I looked at my bed and laughed. How many other habits do I have as an adult that sprung from my childhood efficiency (no it was not laziness.)
I hope to have an easier time of it tonight, but throughout the day, I plan to challenge a few more of my habits. The Universe and my kids will thank me.

What can you change? Change your life before life changes you.
Be you, be well, be changed.
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Day 292; What's Your Nickname?

Just call me Happy

What’s Your Nickname?

The word nickname comes from the Old English word ekename, which means additional name. The word later became nekename and then the spelling became what we have today; nickname.
When I was a girl, I thought my name was Hedgy or Redhead; sometimes it was Gip. My sister Christine called me Hedgy, because every day she would plait my hair in those three braids that most girls wore back then, but when I got home from school, my hair would be standing straight up like a hedge bush; and hence the name Hedgy.
My Aunt Geraldine, was not really my aunt, but the sister of my aunts boyfriend. Aunt Geraldine gave me the power to love myself and see myself as beautiful. “Who’s the cutest redhead girl in the projects?” She would ask me. She would wait until I said “Me” and then she’d ask another question. “What redhead had the biggest smile in the projects?” “Me,” was the answer to all of her questions regarding redheads and beauty.
I was called Gip by my brother Kevin. Gip is pig spell backward and because he was not allowed to call me pig, he quietly but deliberately called me gip.
My children are rather good at nicknaming others. One studious aunt is called Aunt Books while one who is full of fun is call Aunt Bo-Bo.
Sometimes nicknames can be cruel, but at times they are spot on.
By the time we are in high school or college, we shed our nicknames like a snake sheds skin; never returning to claim them and barely recognizing ourselves in it we hear it again.
Today, think about your childhood nicknames. What did yours mean and what did it mean to you? How and why did you ever have the name? Was it born from kindness or cruelty?
Have you shed your old name? What nickname would you give yourself?
When my children came to me, they already had their wonderful names, but sometimes for the fun of it I give them new ones. The names are always rejected because let’s face it, who wants to be called Tituba (as in the Salem witch) or Clepophus (as in Cleophus?)

Be you, be well, be renamed
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Day 291; Get Back the to Basics

Ready, Set, Dance

                                             Get Back to The Basics
Yesterday, someone reminded me of something I used to do. I had forgotten how much I liked to put on music and just dance. I danced until I forgot myself, my movements my rhythm, and my own thoughts.
I had forgotten how much I liked to wake up to large bottle of water.
I had forgotten the need and the power of singing.
Today, I’m getting back to the basics, the ones I lived by before a head injury, before my daughter’s illness, my mother’s death, my other daughter’s passing and life.
We all have things that take us off  our course and out of the game.
I’m imploring you to get back in your own game and get back to the basics of your life.
What have you forgotten about your own self?
What got left behind?
Sometimes when things don’t go the way we desire and life happens, we look for ways to make them right. In an attempt to do so, we often dismantle and eliminate a lot that was good.

Go back to your center, yourself and your you.
Be you, be well, be whole,
Bertice Berry, PhD.


Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Day 290; Internal and the External

 Smart Can Get Cute but…

When my girls were younger and wanted to do nothing but play in make-up, I would often tell them that smart can always get cute but cute can’t always get smart.
I may have to make that into a bumper sticker and ride around a mall parking lot. Lately, I have been meeting too many people who spend a lot of time on their outside, but far too little on the inside.
I know people who can tell you the latest fashion, hair and make-up trends, but they know absolutely nothing and care even less about taking care if their insides.
There was a time when a dentist would not bleach teeth without taking care of them first, but now you can get them whitened in a mall; even when there is decay. I know folks who put false lashes over a leaky eye and people who will put high tight heels on bad feet.
Many years ago, I had a job teaching students who back then were called remedial learners. These young adults were all many years behind in their reading and writing skills, yet with an intense and a very creative approach, and their strong desire and commitment to learn, we were able to see tremendous progress.
One day, I was teaching about the difference between the internal and the external when one student raised his hand and stood up. He said, “I need to know something and I want and answer now.”
The “kid” towered over everyone in the room. He rarely spoke but when he did his deep commanding voice commanded everyone’s attention.
“What is it?” I asked softly, hoping that it would encourage him to take some of the bass out of his voice. It did not. “If I take care of the intrinsic will I get the extrinsic?”
I smiled that beaming smile that some teacher had taught me along the way, the one that says “You are the one I’ve been seeking,” and I told him yes.
He sat back down and I shared more. I told the class that if they would focus on internal values, then the desires for the extrinsic would change. This time, he smiled and I was overjoyed.
Take care of what matters and everything will become energy. Or as Einstein said:
Be you, be well, be smart and cute
Bertice Berry, PhD.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Day 289: Be Encouraged

Be Encouraged

I don’t know about anybody else, but every year when I see those plastic pumpkins in the grocery store, I feel like it’s time for me to be tired. It’s some marketing company’s signal that the year is winding down and it’s time for me to start buying Christmas stuff.
For lots of folks it’s also a time of seasonal depression and sadness.
Be encouraged, the year is not over and neither are you.
Be encouraged because without winter, (as we saw this past year) the pests will grow and eat up your crop before you can take it to harvest.

Be encouraged because in spite of what anyone may say, think or announce, you are better than you were last year or you would not be reading this.

Be encouraged, for as the characters in one of my books said, “If you ain’t dead you aint done.

Be encouraged because the year, the race, the journey is not over.

Be encouraged because the mistakes of this year will be the lessons for the next.

Be encouraged because whether you know it, like it or believe it; we are all in this together.

Get ready for life, because life is ready for you to live.
Be you, be well, be encouraged.
Bertice Berry, PhD.