The Search for Satisfaction
Several years ago, one of my favorite authors, J. California Cooper wrote a book titled, In Search of Satisfaction. I looked at the book for months before I finally read it because I was fixated on the title.
Typically, when I talk about the search for satisfaction, people think I mean settling for less than what you desire. I think that satisfaction is just the opposite; satisfaction is knowing that you have all that you need.
Satisfaction is difficult to achieve in a society that that teaches “more is better.” We compete for the best house, car, spouse, and even children. Our lives are one big competition to be the envy of our neighbors.
I don’t know about you, but I’d like to be the love of my neighbors and friends.
So how do we get to the point of satisfaction? When do we know that enough is enough?
Let’s spend a moment on the lack of satisfaction. When a person is not satisfied, they will find fault in everything they do and everything someone else does as well. You can give them a new car, but they will immediately think about trading it in for something better. If an unsatisfied person says they are hungry and you feed them, they will tell you about someone else’s food and how they wished they had it. (I used to love to see someone do this when my mother was around. She would take their food from them, throw it away and tell the person to go and get the food they preferred. God knows I miss my mother.)
Because I travel a great deal, I have learned to love wherever I am. I can entertain myself with a book or a story and I always find a new person interesting. Satisfaction comes easy to me, but there have been times in my life when I have been harder on myself than I need to be. I have wanted more from me than I deserved. I hope I am making sense to you today because there’s more.
If you do not like who you are, you can’t expect better to show up.
I’d like you to write yourself a letter. I know it’s getting a little “hippy” like but stay with me.
In the letter, tell yourself what you appreciate about you. Write about your accomplishments and none of your shortcomings.
Tell yourself that right now, you are enough.
A person who is not satisfied with their own life will find it hard to be satisfied with anyone else’s. We are all connected to one another.
What I do and how I feel about myself will have an impact on everyone else around me.
Be you, be whole, be satisfied.
Bertice Berry, PhD.