Learning to know when Enough is Enough
Today, I’d like you to look at your behavior through one of my mother’s many sayings.
My mother was a very complex and complicated woman. It took many years for her to come into being the wise and amazing Being she was before she left this earth, but even before then when she was drinking, yelling, or just mad, she always had great sayings. It took me many years to decipher most of them.
“You need to learn to leave well enough alone.” She’d say.
I know now that she meant that I may have started out with a good intention or action, but then I went too far.
I still fall into this trap of “over-doing it” and I can hear my mother saying,
“Alright, you ‘bout to find out that fat meat is greasy.” In other words, “A leopard never changes its spots.”
Today, I’d like you to look at the following:
· Can you tell when you are about to go over board? If you’re eating something good and then you go back for more and more, do you know when you should have stopped? If you are making a point and you can tell from the look on your co-workers’ faces that you have gone too far why do you keep talking?
· At what point do you finally stop yourself? Does someone have to interrupt you; do you hear my mother too? Try to recall the point of correction and use it before you have gone too far.
· Do you beat yourself up when you go too far? If you do, chances are you will punish yourself by repeating the same behavior. “Wallowing in mud won’t get you clean.”
· Anything that is learned can be unlearned.---That one was from me.
This exercise is simple, but you will see that it can have a great impact on changing the cognitive script you have played over and over again.
Once you begin to change your own behavior you will begin to see that “Every dog has his day.” ---I’m still working on that one.
Be you, be well, be in control.
Bertice Berry, PhD.