When I was a kid, I was teased about being fat; more specifically, I was teased about having a big butt. This was not just the run-of-the mill teasing it was right up there with bullying.
One day when I was crying about it a wise woman gave me great advice, “Learn to love yourself as you are or change it,” she said.
I decided to do both; I would love myself while I was changing.
As a result I have earned a rather healthy view of myself and others by looking at them and not their bodies.
Still, sometimes those old insecurities creep up.
I believe that our insecurities are the foundation of most of our problems. The ego gets in the way when it is too high or too low, but even the ego is a slave to your insecurities.
· Insecurity leads to comparison. We look about and see something that someone else has and feel less about our own self.
· Comparison leads to jealousy.
· Jealousy leads to coveting
· Coveting leads to strife, envy and suffering.
Here’s the thing, rather than deal with the insecurity, we are striving to become better warriors. We work towards getting what someone else has, whether we need it or not and then when it does not fulfill us, we start this cycle of insecurity all over again.
A few weeks ago, when I was in a store, I saw what appeared to be a butt hanging on the wall. It was a silicone butt enhancer. I laughed out loud. All of my life I had been trying to make my butt smaller while there were others who were trying to make their butts bigger.
If we could all learn to like what we have and who we are, we really could make the world a better place.
We only need a critical mass to think this way---something like 20% is all.
Today, I’d like you to tell yourself that you are good enough. (Yes, I can hear Stewart Smally behind me: “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough and dog gone it, people like me”.)
When you see yourself as beautiful, you will see the world that way too.
Be you, be well, be secure.
Bertice Berry, PhD.
|The real thing|