Thursday, August 27, 2015

New Self/Old Self

My New Self is My Old Self

We all have our insecurities. For years, I dealt with the insecurity concerning my looks. I thought I was all of the things I had been told as a child; fat, ugly and too black. (Too black for what; I finally asked myself.)

Late one night; unable to sleep, I turned on my television to the PBS channel. I saw a beautiful woman on a program I had never seen. I thought to myself; “I’d love to look like that. She’s the perfect size and has beautiful skin and her smile is amazing.”

I’m tearing up as I write this, because as crazy as it may be, I looked more closely and could see that the beautiful woman was me. I had tapped a series for PBS that helped teach English as a second language. I’d never seen the series, so when I did, I could not even recognize the beautiful women on the other side of the screen.

That night, I cried and cried. I had been holding an image of myself that was not accurate. It was based on the lies I’d been told by folks who had been told the same lies about themselves.

That night, I grew up and away from the childhood insecurity.

·         What lie have you believed about yourself?

·         What are you holding inside of you that affects the way you feel and act?

The only way to address and insecurity is to go inside. Too often, we seek to fill our void with the love of another broken soul, the good feeling of drugs, food or alcohol. We even try to mask our doubts with busywork that centers on anything but the thing that we need to face.

We spend more time and money on the security of our house than we do for the insecurities of the self.

Today, look at yourself and then go inside.
Look deeply at the old feelings of self-worth and face them with the truth; that you are beautiful, powerful and wonderful as you are and you always have been.
Be You, Be Well, Be Strong
Bertice Berry, PhD.

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